The science has been done and the verdict is in: according to luminary physicists, biologists, and neurologists, free will is a delusion. That is, you are only able to behave as the chemistry of which you are made determines, and have never made a decision about anything in your entire life. Hmm, I feel my chemistry telling me that once again the tall-foreheads are leading us down The Garden Path.

This, as you may have already figured out by now, is surely - let us ne honest here - among the very least-visited pages on the whole world wide web. But here it is, some tiny event that the universe has been inexorably tumbling toward for 14 billion years. No creativity here, just atomic dominos falling in the sequence and pattern set up by the initial conditions of the cosmos (and if you're confused by my eractic train-of-thought, it's not too late to read that very short garden path essay and catch up). Ridiculous you say? People a lot smarter than you or I say otherwise. That a completely untrained brain would stumble upon the humble sounds you are inexplicably about to listen to was never in any doubt - it could not have happened otherwise. I am the monkey who randomly typed out a Shakespeare sonata (OK, Franz Liszt I am not, but you get my point). And so I invite you to wonder about wonder as J.E.Bowser, the lucky chimp and avalanche of mechanistic chemistry, plonks on his noise box. Strange that all those Countless Bizarrillions of Quantum Events should happen to fall just this way...